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Horny as a billy goat, I headed out into the bright, sunshiny day.I guess the old saying is right.When the kittens are away, the mouse will play.Christmas week in Vail is wild. Every bed in the area is sold, primarily to families there for the holidays. I walked through the town, talking to people, the spirit of the holidays growing in me with each step. I stopped at a restaurant for a cup of hot cocoa to go. When the cocoa was gone, I went to my favorite bar which is a hang out for the Vail singles, those young people who work in the town to care for the tourists. I pushed my way into it.Molly was behind the bar. She was a “lifer” as the full time, permanent, residents of Vail call themselves.“Hi, Davy. What can I get you?” she asked, shoving the peanuts in front of me. Molly is about six feet tall and weights probably one sixty. She is all muscle because every available moment she spends skiing, hiking or in the gym. Still.“Give me a Coors, Molly. Say, do you prefer sirloin or tube. .After the cop had shouted, 'Pedestrians!' for the tenth time, Paddy went over to him and said, 'Is it not about time ye let the Catholics across?'Gallagher opened the morning newspaper and was dumbfounded to read in the obituary column 20 that he had died. He quickly phoned his best friend, Finney.'Did you see the paper?' asked Gallagher. 'They say I died!!''Yes, I saw it!' replied Finney. 'Where are ye callin' from?'An Irish priest is driving down to New York and gets stopped for speeding in Connecticut. The state trooper smells alcohol on the priest's breath and then sees an empty wine bottle on the floor of the car.He says, 'Sir, have you been drinking?''Just water, ' says the priest.The trooper says, 'Then why do I smell wine?'The priest looks at the bottle and says, 'Good Lord! He's done it again!'Walking into the bar, Mike said to Charlie the bartender, 'Pour me a stiff one - just had another fight with the little woman.''Oh yeah?' said Charlie, 'And how did this one end?''When.
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